The Weekend Leader - Can you read the signs?

Can you read the signs?

New Delhi

25-August-2021

Photo:IANS

How would you react if somebody told you that you could actually predict if your partner is the right one for you or not? Sounds too good to be true right! But this can happen only if you are aware and notice the red flags at the initial stage in your relationship!

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What are the red flags?

No matter how beautiful and in love they make us feel, relationships are complicated! They are unpredictable as you don't know what really lies ahead. But wouldn't it be an amazing process if you could predict and analyze whether your partner is 'the one for you or not'? Of course, there aren't any superpowers to gauge this, all you need to do is pay attention to some subtle yet essential red flags!

Going by the experience of Gleeden users who have faced this kind of situation numerous times in their lives, enlisted below is a glimpse at some of these signs to help you notice whether this relationship is or isn't working out:


Complimenting too much and too often

Sure being complimented sounds sweet and lovey-dovey! It makes you feel good and confident about yourself. It also shows that your partner is thinking and this is just one of the ways to make you feel special. But complimenting too much and too often is a clear sign of obsession and might get creepy.

It may sound odd, but all this admiration may in fact not be completely real. If your partners are over-enthusiastic about you, then they are probably pushing to create an impression of 'an ideal relationship' image which is indeed fake. As soon as things don't happen as per their expectations, this image will eventually dissolve and break both of you emotionally.
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Sugarcoating is indeed a red flag in any relationship and 37.23 per cent of Gleeden users have confirmed the same. Interestingly about 23.73 per cent of them are aware of the fact that their partners are giving fake compliments to them to hide guilt or a deed that they have already committed.

Talking ill about their ex

Ex-relationships can be toxic and ex-partners can be traumatic. Talking bad about them is normal and healthy behaviour. However, if your partner completely ignores his/her mistakes and constantly blames their exes for every bad event that occurred or even for the separation, then this is a red flag that should certainly not be ignored! It simply depicts that they are not ready to take accountability for anything that went wrong. Probably, they would do the same with you in the future as well. Always remember it always takes two to break a bond and just one of the partners can't be blamed entirely for the relationship not working out!


Continuous bad mouthing someone who was related to your past is not a sign of a good human being irrespective of their gender and 35.89 per cent of Gleeden users have confirmed the same. Also, about 32.19 per cent of them say that if their partner cannot respect their past they won't be able to do justice to their current relationship as well.

Disrespecting his/her family

Having family issues is indeed common. Being distant from family is one thing but being mean and disrespectful towards them is totally unacceptable! If you notice that your partner misbehaves or disrespects his/her family, then this is your cue to step back and reconsider your relationship. It's tough to start a relationship or build a family with a person who doesn't treat his/her parents and loved ones with love, care, and empathy.


As the phrase goes; If you cannot be loyal to your parents, you cannot be loyal to anyone and 42.53 per cent of Gleeden users have voted in affirmation of the same. Interestingly, about 24.76 per cent of them are willing to help their partners learn family values despite all odds.

Cheated on their ex with you

This statement in itself is self-explanatory, if your partner cheated on his/her ex with you, then you never know the next to be cheated on is probably you. As the saying goes, 'once a cheater, always a cheater'. So you won't really be able to be with someone with whom you would be having major trust issues!


Cheating is a big no-no in any relationship and 44.23 per cent of Gleeden users have agreed on this statement whereas 31.45 per cent of them believe that a second chance shall only be provided to those who admit their cheating rather than being caught.

Invades your private space

Being in a healthy and happy relationship implies living in harmony where there is trust, love, care, support, and respect along with the right to maintain your personal privacy. Hence, if your partner asks for your passwords be it social media, phone, or financial apps, then he/she is certainly crossing the line and invading your private space. Just refuse firmly and re-consider your relationship!


There is a fine line between being close to someone and invading their personal space. In a relationship where two people are sharing their living space or are in continuous touch throughout the day, respecting each other's personal space or 'me' time is the responsibility of every partner and 44.14 per cent of users have confirmed the same. If someone invades this, it can lead to the downfall of the relationship according to users as 32.18 per cent of them have voted for the same.

The ones who try to change you

Being in a relationship doesn't mean losing your individuality or personal integrity. However, there are some toxic partners who would want to change you so that you can match up to their expectations. This could be the way you dress, the friends you hang out with, the kind of profession you are in to even your physical appearance, body weight, style, etc. This is another major sign that once you notice, you should bid goodbye and move on because a person with this nature would never be satisfied. Relationships are about accepting each other with their respective strengths and flaws. It's about bringing out the best of each other, improving each other, and not changing your individualities!


If he loves you, he will love you the way you are and that's a fact approved by the Gleeden users as 42.10 per cent of them have voted for the same. Also, 32.14 per cent of them don't mind changing their habits that are not good for the family!

No person or relationship is perfect! In order to work out things, one needs to put in a lot of effort and make adjustments at various levels. While accepting the partner the way he/she is, is extremely important but certain behaviours are indeed red flags in the truest sense which shouldn't be ignored. Since we love our 'significant another half', we tend to surpass all the small issues that trouble us. But this just creates an illusion that everything is going the right way and the relationship is going strong!

You can't really know somebody completely within the first few days of being together. Knowing each other is indeed a gradual process. However, with this list, we hope you will be prepared to ask yourself these questions at the very beginning so as to avoid breaking your heart in the long run!-IANS



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